feeling unfulfilled

Lately I feel really unfulfilled.
Although I feel I am finally accomplishing things/tasks I've been meaning to accomplish for a long time now, there is still an empty space in me.
Seeing photos of an old friend who I used to be best friends with for three years but then she decided she no longer wanted to be friends was heartbreaking.
To this day I still don't understand why she no longer wanted to be friends.
Not knowing why has left a questionable mark on who I am as a person - even though this was years ago.
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Am I a selfish person?
Do I not give enough of myself to others?
Is it wrong to want time for myself, to be alone, to work on things I enjoy rather than have to give every single day to someone else?
Is this why I can't find my other half?
Have I been unknowingly selfish all my life to pursue my interests after so long of putting them off for others?
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All I want to do is run and Run and RUN.
Running has been so calming for me.
I did 14 miles over the weekend - 4 fri, 5 sat, 5 sun.
Sunday really should have been a cross-train day but I didn't run Thurs to rest my achy leg.
My body is finally enjoying all this running, even though sometimes I hurt like hell afterwards, the freedom to run is magnificent!
I enjoy more running among the line of waiting cars backed up in traffic with the people cheering me on.
It really helps me to keep pushing along.
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Am I sabotaging myself not allowing someone to get close to my heart?
Those who I do consider allowing are only liars, or not genuinely interested.
That's why it feels better to be alone.
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I finally gathered all Your stuff this weekend and off I will ship it to the Photographer for his project.
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I'm overwhelmed. I feel I don't have enough time in my day for everything that must get done.
I wish I could skip sleep for like 4 days in a row and still function normally.
I'm juggling full-time work, marathon training, raw eating (which requires meal prep everyday), my campus classes (drawing and photography), my online class, my case, keeping up maintenance on my relationships.
Can personal-self life be even considered in this category?
I hate feeling like a bad friend, a bad student, a bad daughter, a bad employee.
I think my training and healthy eating is the only things working at keeping depression at bay for the moment.
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I wish I could be so much more than what I am now.