Sad Day

Today was a sad day.
I was so excited to get a run in after work, but while running my legs, top and bottom, were aching so badly.
Like it felt like it was in my bones. :(
I'm really worried about training for the marathon as a raw vegan.
I want to make sure I'm getting all the essential nutrients that I need for my muscles to recovery quickly.
But I kind of feel like they're not.
I know running on pavement is also not helping, but sad as it is, the actual race will be on pavement and asphalt, so I might as well train on it now I guess.
My knees ache.
My quads ache.
Am I not strong enough for this?
I hike and hit the gym often - consecutively since April.
But my legs have always been my trouble spot when it comes toning them.
So am I just using the muscles that have been hard for me to hit?
I really googled this when I got back from my run.
I was on the verge of tears because it was so frustrating to want to run but physically I couldn't.
I was even pissed off because I saw someone running in vibrams and I thought:
"what the fuck?! you are fat and you can gracefully run in these and I can't?!"
Sad day for me.
If I could, I would be running in my vibrams.
But the last time I did I wasn't able to last long, and I think I stress fractured something in my foot because I was unable to workout for the next few days.
And I really rather not risk that happening again.

Another problem is, I never feel like eating anymore.
I find I have less of an appetite right after I run, but that is when I should eat the most I know, to help repair my muscles quickly.
Unfortunately winter time sucks when it comes to raw food.
I was this close...
THIS CLOSE I tell you... to eat Chipotle tonight because I was just too exhausted to prepare a meal, even though I know I've been dying for salad lately....
Literally, dying.

It was a sad day for Kat at work also.
But yesterday was a good day because I had another lunch date :)
Except I guess that might have been awful because I just talked and talked and spill all my secrets, and then he tells me that he thinks it's cute that I do this, or that.
And he tells me that I look adorable in my outfit, that I always look nice....
And he mentioned I glow (from my vegan ways).
And I just feel myself blush and get so nervous
and really I was thinking I glow only because I'm freakin' sweating across the table from being so nervous..
But I really like that he said I glow...that's the best complement I think I've ever received really.
I really like that.
For reals.